Once upon a time there was a piano pedal, and it was a very happy piano pedal, because it got pushed more than the other two piano pedals, who were less happy, because they didn't get pushed as much as the first piano pedal. The piano pedal said to the other two piano pedals, "I get pushed more than either of you. Therefore, I have more of a purpose in life, whereas you have less of a purpose in life."

One of the other two piano pedals said, "It is true that you are pushed more often than we," and the other of the two piano pedals said, "I agree," but they said these things solemnly and with great remorse and self-pity.

As time went on, the first piano pedal, being more used, became more scratched and dirty than the other two, and it developed a stiff joint with considerable swelling, especially on rainy days, and by and by the piano pedal had to be replaced. The first of the other two piano pedals said, "Now we are even sadder, because we will miss our friend," and the other of the other two piano pedals said, "We wasted too much time in self-pity, when we could have been treasuring the moments we had together as a team," to which the first of the other two piano pedals replied, "Truly, our self-pity has been our undoing," to which the other of the other two piano pedals replied, "Yes," and by and by the original piano pedal was replaced, and the new piano pedal said, "Hi, my name is Fred," and the other two piano pedals said, "Hi," only not in unison, and the piano pedal called Fred said, "Hi," and then felt very foolish for repeating himself, for he lacked confidence in social environments and frequently made awkward blunders with ritual pleasantries, much to his great chagrin.

As time went on, it became apparent that Fred, like his predecessor before him, was the most used of the three piano pedals, but Fred politely made no mention of the fact, and the first of the other two piano pedals said, "Wow, excellent job, Fred," and the other of the other two piano pedals said, "Yes," and then the first of the other two piano pedals said to the other of the other two piano pedals, "Remember when we didn't feel as good about ourselves as now?" to which the other of the other two piano pedals said to the first of the other two piano pedals, "Yes," and Fred said, "What?" and the other two piano pedals said, "The piano pedal before you flaunted his usefulness and made us feel bad," only not in unison, and Fred replied, "Why, that's terrible," and the other two piano pedals said, "Yes," only not in unison.

"It's clear to me," said the first of the other two piano pedals to Fred, "that you have taught us all a very important lesson that your predecessor did not know, and that is that one should feel guilty for his successes in life and hide them away, lest others feel inadequate by comparison," and Fred said "Oh, I am thankful to be an instrument of learning," and the other of the other two piano pedals said, "Where did you learn this lesson?" and Fred said, "One time I got a perfect score on a vocabulary test, and the other kids beat me up."