Once upon a time, there was a thingie. The thingie knew that it was something more specific than just a thingie, because it lived in a house where the people called things thingies, because they could never think of the right word, and so the refrigerator was a thingie and the desk was a thingie and the picture on the wall was a thingie on the thingie. But the thingie didn't know what kind of a thingie, exactly, it was, and so it wondered at its purpose in life.

So the thingie went to another thingie, and the thingie asked the thingie, "What kind of a thingie are you?" and the thingie said, "I am a mirror," and the thingie said, "What do you do?" and the mirror said, "When people look into me, I show them what they look like," and the thingie said, "Am I also a mirror?" and the mirror said, "Maybe so!"

So the thingie perched itself on the mirror and waited for someone to look at it, and by and by someone came in to shave, and the someone looked at the thingie and frowned and said, "I cannot see myself, because this thingie is in the way," and the someone took the thingie and put it away.

"I guess I am not a mirror," said the thingie, but it did not give up its quest, for it saw an open package of thingies, and it asked the thingies, "What kind of thingies are you?" and the thingies said, "We are cookies," and the thingie said, "What do you do?" and the cookies said, "When people eat us up, they get cavities," and the thingie said, "Am I also a cookie?" and the cookies said, "Maybe so!"

So the thingie stuffed itself inside the package, next to the other cookies, and waited for someone to eat it, and by and by someone came in to eat a cookie, and the someone looked at the thingie and said, "This is not a cookie," and then, "I cannot eat this at all," and the someone took the thingie and put it away.

"I guess I am not a cookie," said the thingie, but it did not give up its quest, for it saw a thingie on the ceiling, and it said, "What kind of thingie are you?" and the thingie said, "I am a light bulb," and the thingie said, "What do you do?" and the light bulb said, "I shine with light so that people can see," and the thingie said, "Am I also a light bulb?" and the light bulb said, "Maybe so!"

So the thingie concocted a plan with the light bulb, and the light bulb unscrewed itself from its socket and lay down on a table for a nap, while the thingie stuffed itself into the socket and waited for someone to turn it on. And by and by, someone turned it on and said, "This thingie does not make light, because it is not a light bulb," and the someone took the thingie and put it away.

"I guess I am not a light bulb," said the thingie, and just then someone came in and took the thingie and put it up to its nose and blew snot all over it and threw it in the trash.